The Black Dress

Say hello to my little black dress.  This exact dress.  Why this dress?  Well, it's V neck, sleeveless, fitted, year round wool, pockets, lined and just at the knee.  So what does all this mean?  The fabric and style means I can wear it year round in Florida comfortably.  I can layer a shirt under it, wear a cardigan with it. Almost all occasion appropriate. The fit is amazing.  It stands on it's own, needing very little accessories.  Or you can wear it however you want.  This dress is a blank canvas.  The woman will be noticed instead of the dress.  The dress is very basic as a staple should be.  Which is why I love it.  So what is your perfect black dress? It doesn't have to be black even.  Navy is great too.  Work with your skin tone.  It should be perfect for you. How would you like it to fit, what occasions would you wear it, is it year round versatile, looks good worn with flats, heels, boots?  Make it earn it's keep in your closet (as all your staples should).

 This dress is the Bridget by JCrew (btw).  Oh, and as a side note, I've found  that many of JCrew's dresses are made with pockets.  Who doesn't love that!

The Black Pant

They say the black pant is a wardrobe staple, and I must say, I can't do without mine.  It goes with everything and is appropriate anywhere.  From sneakers to heels, day to night to weekend.  It is that versatile.  My black pants are a cropped, cuffed and tapered pair, right above the ankle (see above).  I got them from Express.  They are fitted without being tight and the proportion works for me, as I can wear heels and flats without worrying about the issue of pants length.  As a matter of fact all my pants are of this style.  One less thing I have to think about - what heel height to wear with what pair of pants.  And while black can be harsh to wear close to the face for some, this is not an issue with pants.  I have two other colors of this particular pant from Express, as I loved the way they fit, and received numerous complements to that effect.  Since I know this shape works for me, whichever stores sell this style will get my business.  As fit, fabric and proportion is queen.  Who cares what brand they are.  I just want them to be of good quality so they last.  And an added bonus if they can be washed (delicate cycle) instead of dryclean.  SOLD!

Btw, I'm not including leggings in the category of black pants.  Leggings are a wardrobe staple, but the jury is out on whether they qualify as pants.  I know some may disagree, but since my work dress code does not include leggings as pants, then I plan my wardrobe accordingly.  Thanks.

The Trench Coat

Trench coats are a tricky thing.  At least for me.  After trying a few brands, buying a few, and finally returning them due to fit issues, I was ready to give up.  Why couldn't I find a trench I could love?  So one day on a whim, I decided to visit the source - Burberry.  I have always admired the way the coats look on the models in the ad campaigns - how fitted and sleek the coats looked as if custom made (which I'm sure some are).

So here I am in a Burberry store near home to check out what makes a Burberry trench what it is.  First thing to note, the sizing is British so don't be alarmed at the size number the sales person assesses you to be. I wanted to try a black or stone color as the. classic khaki is not so flattering for my skin tone.  They had neither in store so the sales associate suggested the military red (shown above) in this style, just to try for size.  And in addition, she picked out a different style trench in black to look for the ideal fit.  Now normally I do not do red.  I prefer subtlety, neutrals.  So off to the fitting room.  I am wearing a roomy sweater that day with skinny jeans and sneakers which I think were perfect in hindsight.  If the trench could look elegant and yet fit in with the casual attire, how much better it would look dressed up or for work?

Phenomenal!!!  This trench style as explained by the associate is a more fitted style, more feminine in cut.  The size 8 I tried on was roomy enough to accommodate movement around the arms and shoulders while wearing the sweater, fitting the bust, waist and hips comfortably without extra width that can sometimes make a trench gather up around the waist when belted and flare too widely like a tent on the hips.  And mid thigh was the perfect length for me.  Again, proportions.  The sleeves were slim without being tight.  And...around the neck.  The coat is designed to be able to stand the collar up as shown in the picture.  That stiff collar that can stand on it's own without crowding the neck.  A fitted coat with an open neckline!  Amazing.  As I looked at myself in the mirror, I was happily surprised by the red.  It looked so good against my skin and not too loud since color seemed to have a hint of brown tint to it.  This red could be a neutral for me, I thought!  Much like a perfect red lipstick.  The associate produced a silk scarf to coordinate with the coat which sent the overall look up above amazing.  I was hooked.  I finally tried on the boxier, classic style in black, the color I was originally looking for.  There was no contest.  Oh, and she showed me a neat trick.  The lapels of the coat can be buttoned back to wear it open.  Ha! I haven't seen that with other coats.

So what did I learn?
1.  Don't ever compromise on the fit of your garments.  They have to suit your proportions or else it's a complete waste of money.  While clothing can be easily altered, coats, not so much! Hold out for the best.  Even if it costs a small fortune, you will get your monies worth in wear over time.
2.  Pay no attention to size numbers.  Every manufacturer has their own system for sizing, so it is never consistent.  What matters most is how it fits.  You can always rip the size tag out if it bothers you that much.  But to go back to the first rule, that is what matters most.
3.  Be open to suggestions.  I went in looking for a specific color which was practical and safe.  Who knew that the girl who does not do red would fall in love with a red coat.  I could still play it safe and go with a neutral but it wouldn't be love.  And for the price, I better love it.
4.  And finally, speaking of price.  Yes a Burberry trench is pricey.  There are many offerings on the market at lower price points.  But here's the thing...do you love it?  Whatever choice you make, I would hope you plan on keeping this coat around for a while.  If you don't love it, then why buy it?

I am saving up for this coat.  (Saving for it keeps the energy clean (I read that somewhere.))  And I know I will be really happy with my choice... And the scarf too!

The Dress Shirt

I love a man's dress shirt...and I'm sure I'm not the only one.  What is the appeal?  The crisp cotton, the stiff collar that stands at attention with or without a tie, so it accentuates the neck without crowding it.   Having clothing fit too snugly around a short neck is a double curse.  The cuffs.  The way the shirt gracefully skims the body, allowing for movement.  What's not to love!  Unfortunately most women's shirts are not made that way, except for a few.  The shirt I am loving  right now is a style from Brooks Brothers.  White, crisp cotton, classic fit, french cuffs, with a stiff collar like a man's shirt.  Brooks Brothers carries a fitted women's shirt in addition to the classic women's fit.  However for my proportions the classic fit works the best - more room for the bust, stomach and arms while subtly skimming the waist rather than hugging it.  All the elements from the men's shirt cut to a woman's body.  Again, I can't stress enough how much your body proportions will determine your fit choices so you feel comfortable as well as elegant in your clothing.  This is the first brand I found that suits my needs, I'm sure there are more. It took some searching, but I found my idea of happiness in a shirt... As I'm sure you will too.

The Fall Coat 2013

Fall... a time of fantasy, the time of year when I look forward to the changing leaves, changing season, changing wardrobe.  My fantasies from my daydreams brought to life by designers in styles starting with the September issues and fine tuning in October and November when the southern states start finally to feel the slight chill in the air and the darkness of the days that our northern friends feel much earlier.  This fall I dream of tweed, wool, plaids and tartans, leather, textures.  The colors in my dreams change too, from the brights and primaries of summer, to a moodier, weightier, cozier feel for fall.  The closet changeover is an event akin to back to school as I start fresh with some things, and renew committment to older, tried and true things.  Very much parallel to my state of mind on the winding down of the current year and making room and plans for the remaining months and new upcoming year.

Fall means we need warm clothes, especially a warm coat.  And while it should be warm to your needs, finding a coat that is equally stunning/amazing elevates your overall outfit and closet to a new level of beauty. That coat for me is insanely simple in it's details, and absolutely stunning.  Unadorned.  To me that's art in a coat.  This Allsaints Vita Wool coat shows the simplicity in detail - single button, fitted shape which make it look lightweight, elegant.  It is simple enough to wear everyday with everything while stunning enough to top evening wear. I am loving light gray or dark navy this year - black feels heavy for me this season.  Oh, and one more thing - proportion.  This length works for me based on my body proportions and preferences.  Fit is so important in choosing the right coat, in choosing all your clothes.

So which coat speaks to you?  After all, you will be living in it for a while - which one will you love years from now as much as you love now?

Book review - Red Hot & Holy by Sera Beak

So I'm inhaling books like pizza and beer. My brain screeching for "more input, more input!" like that robot in that 80's movie (yes, I'm dating myself.) Whatevs!
My most recent devour "Red Hot & Holy..." by Sera Beak, and I have to say - holy shit!  Her previous Red Book was really cool, but it left me wondering where to go next.  Both my index fingers pointing in opposite directions crossed over my chest.  Been a wanderer spiritually all my life and this Red Book gave me even more options, I got so confused.  No fault to her or the book.  It just was general.  Now I think that maybe it was a way for me to get my feet wet before the ice cold, fiery dunk of Red Hot & Holy.
So, here goes...
First off, I just love this book.   It being so personal, Sera sharing her story, her journey so far in Red.  Personal stories mean so much more to me than general facts, theories, precepts, whatever else you want to describe them as.  Her story was all together epic, hard, funny, embarrassing, loving, divine, human and everything else you can think to name.  Her transparency allowed me to see into my own life, my own relationship with the Divine Feminine.  With Sera, I drew some similarities to myself, her openness made it feel so natural to ask some questions of myself I didn't even think ask or was afraid to.  In this book, she held space for herself and I to delve into the interior of us to see and live the wisdom and divinity there.  To embody ourselves.  And most importantly, to affirm that no one on the outside can direct our way in this, it all comes from going within.  I can't point to any specific practices, because there are none save what each of us knows to be true in our heart of hearts.  But in Sera telling her story, I can come to some trust of my  own.  And this is the Universe to me.  I am awed, excited, jumping out of my skin scared of what lies ahead as I commit to my own journey, whatever color it turns out to be.  But today after reading this book of hope and love, I know that while the road may be rocky and suck like ... it will be worth it to be fully myself in all her glorious glory, spreading my awesome good into this Universe as only I am meant to, loving Her, being Her, living Her, or Him...or both!  Cool, huh?

New year, better me.

Happy 2013!  Yes I know I'm late...but things just got back to somewhat normal in my world.  I feel like finally I can exhale and focus on the things I want for this year.  So this is the year I turn 40.  How do I feel about that?  Well...On the one hand I am feeling really hopeful because it is a new phase of my life.  A time marked by my sovereignty.  I finally feel like I'm the captain of my ship, I don't have to live by the expectations of others.  I feel a sense of freedom from the angst of people pleasing, all the phobias and insecurities that plagued me in my younger self.  On the other hand, there are things I need to come to terms with, ideas and dreams I may need to let go of, changes that need to be made and also realize that I don't look like I did when I was younger anymore.  I don't wish to turn back time and be young again, but it's really hard to come to terms with getting older and not feeling beautiful. I need to redefine what beauty means to me, to encompass the added maturity now present.  I didn't fully acknowledge my beauty in my youth and now see how different those years would have been if I did.  Yes there are regrets...Yes there are things I wished I did.  The things I thought mattered back then, I know now are irrelevant, especially when it comes to following your desires vs. what people may think of you.  The valuable lessons of enjoying everyday and loving your life are whispered behind secret curtains so low, you almost don't hear.  Chasing after things are what we're told, where we could have spent less time doing that and more embracing ourselves within.  In the midst of this whirlwind call chaos, our home, our calm is within.  Our north, our star, our light, our truth, within.  Our compass and link to the source, within.  That is what should matter above all else.  And the definition of our beauty lies within.  This is my task this year.  I want to be whole, I want to be fully myself for the next chapter of my life.  I want my best life this time.  I can't accept anything less.  My soul depends on it. 

So I've started planning my birthday, it's only a few months away.  I had so much fun surfing year before last on my birthday, I'm thinking of making a weekend of it with my family.  A whole weekend at the beach.  How awesome is that!!!This feels almost as awesome as going to Jamaica for vacation.  This feels good, so I'm going with it.  Thanks for listening.